Agonistes of the Eternal Wait

Merry Christmas!!!

2011-12-25T05:51:00.000-08:00

z z Z z Z z z

2011-11-30T19:57:00.001-08:00

I have not had any desire to post on this blog or make it look cool and attractive, but I'd like to think I'll gain it back soon. Bare with me guys. Or don't I guess.......

----

私はこのブログに投稿するか、クールで魅力的に見せるためにどんな願望を持っていなかったが、私はすぐにそれを戻す得ると思うしたいと思います。私たちと裸。

2011-08-13T21:36:00.000-07:00

All Works in Progress

2011-08-06T23:08:00.000-07:00

Before

And After

also

★。、::。.::・'゜☆

2011-08-06T22:59:00.000-07:00

I gots eyeballs on my ears.

I miss Kane.

❤

2011-08-06T22:52:00.000-07:00

For my boyfriend's birthday I made him mini chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter inside decorated like PokeBalls. Only one had a candle but there were about 40 of them.....

Only twelve years too late..

2011-08-06T21:53:00.000-07:00

I found Furby Eu de Toilette downtown.

If only I knew then, what I know now....

BEARIZONA

2011-07-03T15:13:00.000-07:00

Bearizona is the most incredible place on earth. The day I went there was probably the best day of my life, I could have cried. I wish I was a bear.

Arizona

2011-07-03T14:41:00.000-07:00

Kane in LA

2011-07-03T13:36:00.001-07:00

flickr

woken up

2011-07-03T12:48:00.001-07:00

☽

Sweet DREAMer☆

2011-06-07T21:47:00.000-07:00

for my love.

view ★here☆

☽

thing

2011-04-03T19:26:00.000-07:00

A Warrior of a Different World

Takeo of the Devine Elegance

Bubble Boy Prince of the Sea

Royal Makoto

2011-03-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

☆ まこと ☆

This is a drawing I did of a fictional girl named Makoto. She is very dear to my heart.

Drawn on 18" x 24" with mechanical and normal (2b and 4b) pencil, then edited on photoshop.

I hope you will like it, prints will be available in the near future !!

Also viewed bigger and better

★here★

~Timid Bear's Tea Party~

2011-03-27T20:48:00.000-07:00

~Tea Party~

Timid Bear held a picnic with his portly friends! One warm summer evening . . .

☆ flickr ☆

The Thrill of It

2011-01-12T01:00:00.000-08:00

©clara conning

On our planet

2011-01-06T17:36:00.000-08:00

I'm waiting for you to join me..

Angelica

2010-12-24T16:25:00.001-08:00

Eyes shut tight, pulsing light surrounds her
Fall to the song lovers sing soft
Angelica, Angelica
Where are your wings?
Seven Guardians stand back watching
Listen to the whispers that wake her
Angelica
Where are your wings?
I hear her calling
I watch her falling
Angelica, Angelica...
Drop from the Divine Asylum
Sink through the skies of Paradise
We hear you calling
Still you are falling
Angelica
Where are your wings?

Thanks ma.

2010-11-08T22:54:00.001-08:00

PARIS !!

2010-11-03T21:26:00.001-07:00

♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡
I miss it.

most photos © clara conning

In Skewed Ascension

2010-11-03T19:21:00.000-07:00

d r e a m l i k ephotography © clara conning

secret gardens

2010-07-04T16:11:00.001-07:00

photos © clara conning and laurie mayer

"Where ever I saw a wild flower lie

I kissed and bade my love good bye."

YEAH!

2010-05-04T16:02:00.000-07:00

I got an A in my life drawing class!

I also got all my drawings back yesterday so here they all are.

My scanner is small so I had to do everything in 3 parts then put them back together in photoshop, hence those annoying lines.

I didn't bother scanning these, but here are photos of the quicker drawings.

And this was my final project on muscle analogies.

I've forgotten how to make things look nice on blogspot, I'm also not sure if you can click on these to make them bigger, but I know you can do that on my flickr.

4.27.10

2010-04-27T11:25:00.001-07:00

40 minute pose.

(click to make it bigger, it's better bigger I swear)

Next week I get all my drawings back from my teacher. Exciting!

"Let's be honest, if only we could"

2010-04-15T14:48:00.000-07:00

PiL at Club Nokia a couple days ago were really really good.

I was one of the very few people who was even moving, let alone dancing, but that certainly didn't stop me. Regardless of the fact that the majority of the crowd was aged around 40+, I still would have thought people would get a little more into it, but give me a vodka and cranberry, some big shoulders and I'll show everyone else how it's done.

John Lydon sounded really amazing. He may be a little fat and yes he may have been wearing track pants, but he sounded no different to how he used to. He arrogant danced all over that stage and demanded that we 'squeal like pigs' (he didn't need to tell me twice). He ridiculed the crowd for being so still and ridiculed himself equally.

It wasn't nearly as mad as one would hope, but sound-wise alone, I really loved it.

LA Weekly got a relatively awkward photo of me:

Then wrote a really negative review of the entire evening. It really isn't even worth reading, but the comments are.

It's more about the venue than anything else and the man who wrote it comes acro

ss as a typical, pretentious LA-er.

(I'm sure they're a nice person really....I want good karma.)

But all in all, as great as I thought it was, nothing had made me miss being in London more. I'd count down the days if I knew where to start.

Anyway, I also saw the Leonardo DaVinci exhibition at The Getty Center. Very inspiring but REALLY TINY.

Every drawing had a magnifying glass underneath so that you could see wh

at was there. I certainly needed to see that though to remind me how good drawing can be.

It's a very nice place to wander around.

She's finished

2010-03-19T11:50:00.000-07:00

Finally! All that needs to be done now is have her fired.

She took a total of 20 hours to create and I love her.

I'm very happy.

The next one is gonna have a human head. How dull.

old film

2010-02-27T19:32:00.001-08:00

true love...

I got some black and white film developed recently. It reminded me how much fun I had in September.

Most of those, as always, are on my flickr.

All my classes are going well. Hopefully soon I'll have good pictures of the paintings and sculptures I've been doing.

'Evening Mood'

2010-02-16T11:30:00.000-08:00

Based on another of Bouguereau's paintings.

progress

2010-02-10T04:09:00.000-08:00

the original:

my copy so far:

unfortunate my scanner is too small to show the birds.

2810

2010-02-08T17:59:00.001-08:00

lovers singing soft

muted under sheets of snow

this winter of solitude has come

the moon looks down at me

as I look for you

no one is here

if I have to lie alone

let me fall asleep

these eyes lie vacant

but your dream is full

you can't see me

I watch this fire burn in your name

I'm seeing flames

burn in me

if I have to lie alone

let me fall asleep

I hear myself singing in a different room

a different time

another voice holds on to mine

I'll rest in the faint harmonic.

I'll rest.

many things.

2010-02-02T23:47:00.000-08:00

lots and lots and lots of bears.

BIG VERSIONS

I got my hair lightened today. Unfortunately it came out very different from what I originally wanted but I guess it doesn't really matter.

also my creative thinking is shown at it's best in this video I made for Ashley earlier.

My art classes have started. Oil painting on Sunday mornings, Life Drawing on Monday nights and Sculpting on Friday afternoons. I'm looking forward to be really good at everything ever.

critter country

2010-01-26T08:30:00.000-08:00

When you don't sleep, bears appear.

Those are 2 of my new bears. There are moremoremore on my flickr .

(including two paintings from london that are not of bears.)

Unfortunately my scanner here is no where near big enough to scan the bigger paintings I've done so far, but eventually I'll take photos and eventually I'll upload them then eventually I'll put them up on here.

Til then. x

One of my better mugs.

2010-01-21T20:47:00.001-08:00

On the other side it features a photo of Dot Cotton. Also a cake shaped like a rabbit.

Here is my cat Eeviee.

Here is my cat Orangey.

The world forgetting, by the world forgot

2009-11-26T13:58:00.000-08:00

I've been having fun whilst I've been forcing myself to be happy.

Burning Cities and Moon Pals

2009-11-20T15:22:00.001-08:00

moon kane!

moon sharifa!

To see them all bigger and better:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/clara_conning/

black milk

2009-10-23T08:24:00.000-07:00

Whispers drip from her mouth to the floor
Spilling out from her throat til she chokes.
spit it out.
spit it out.
resting in a pool of her own discrepancies
waiting for someone to lick them up.

Good night.

2009-09-27T18:54:00.001-07:00

It's been quite a week.

Have I been asleep?

2009-09-20T03:36:00.000-07:00

In a dream
I'm in a Garden
watch the leaves wave to the sun
lying in silence; this seems magic
Magic Reminds Me

I try to go there now, but I think I lost it.
Faking a Smile but my Wishes were Sincere
Did I say them outloud?

It's raining in the Garden now.
I'll look up as long as you look away.
Have I really been asleep?

"I'll do my dreaming with my eyes wide open, and I'll do my looking back with my eyes closed"

6 days left.

2009-08-28T01:24:00.000-07:00

© laurie mayer photography
(aside from the taxidermy animal, that one's mine)

This time in America has been a lot of things. I'm so excited to be going back, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit sad summer is ending.

I was Lonely, so I made a Friend

2009-08-25T22:44:00.000-07:00

she's very similar to my last figure.

except she's about half the size, and is healthier.

I haven't left my house once, in the past 7 days.
From here I've only got 7 more days til I'm back in London.

"I want to wake up in a city that never sleeps"

2009-08-19T14:42:00.000-07:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/clara_conning/

I've been graded!

2009-08-17T00:27:00.000-07:00

I got my grades from Otis College of Art and Design today!

Black and White photography (main focus) - A !!!

Life drawing - B+!
(which is extremely surprising, I was expecting much lower)

As always, everything is uploaded on to my flickr.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/clara_conning

this is new too:
(It looks better when it's bigger. and also in person...)

From January to May

2009-08-08T16:05:00.000-07:00

Drunken nights that are hard to remember, days with one that are hard to forget.

Canadian Spirit and cheap wine stains on my dresses.
Home made studios and running away to the west.
Walking in the snow, then staggering through the mud.
Avoiding rain and waiting for the sun.
Every scream and despondent sigh.
Every mistake and unearthed lie.
Mysterious bruises and cigarette burns.
Valuable lessons gone unlearned.
A stolen trip to Cambridge and a used ticket to Leeds.
A sawed off lock of hair and a runaway key.
Every laugh, every tear.
Every minute spent at "home" for the past 4 years.
I've kept them all as souvenirs.

Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea

2009-08-06T22:01:00.000-07:00

New York City.

Day 1

There's a constant roar. Constantly running and humming as it flows around me. Stuck between layers of steal and cement, I have to remind myself I'm above ground. I try not to get swept away by this roaring sea, but I have yet to feel steady on the ground. Helicopters above me. Cars all around me. Subway below me. Everything shakes. I don't feel stable so I don't stop moving. Nothing does. Nobody does.

Steam billows up from the streets and into the air. It comes from underground. As I walk down to the depths of florescence and metal, everyone's holding their heads and covering their ears. Why are you covering your ears? all I hear is a faint scream in the distance. It gets louder and louder and I feel a slight sense of panic as a sudden rush of air whips past and the subway screams louder than any machine should. The scream dies out, a spark pops and flies, and the train finally comes to a stop. Every clank. Every bang. I can feel it. I want to get out. I want to cover my ears. I don't like it down here, but I get in, it heads back to the hotel.

From my balcony I can see into a hundred peoples' windows. Some of them are lit. One room in the middle of the building on the right has a couple with a little black cat inside. They're on their bed, teasing the cat with a string. One room is only lit by the blue flickering light of a television, and I can see a lone silhouette watching it. In the left building, a window close to the top looks like a little girl's room. There's a grand looking doll house with a white roof and a little pink bed. The light is on, but I haven't seen the little girl that lives there. Just below that is a room with an upright piano. It's open, ready to be played with at least 3 books of music waiting to be read. Maybe if I wait, I'll see someone play it. Maybe I'll be able to hear it over this constant roar.

Day 3

Different lit up at night. Never see the same person twice. The children's rooms are dark now, the nightwalkers' are lit. People are sitting on their balcony above and across from me are, smoking more than I am. I haven't seen anyone play that piano.

Day 5 (last day)

Every day that I've been here, I've walked around as if I know exactly what I'm doing. Where I'm going. As if I know what's around each corner, and then every corner I turn I'm proved wrong. I know nothing about this city and it knows nothing about me. Every person I see, I recognize but they don't recognize me. I haven't once felt alone here, but I've never been so aware of being on my own.

I've stayed transfixed by the windows across from me. Even now at 4:40 am, I can see people up and awake. Down below there's still a steady stream of cars and pedestrians for them to intimidate. It never stops. This city's still moving. Still roaring.

On the top floor of the building on the left, 3 windows in a row are lit by the violent flashes of tv light. I almost expect the flashes to be in sync. A few floors down there are 2 rooms, completely lit up. No curtains to hide them, but no body to hide. They're completely empty. Directly across from me, I can see a man walking in his room. I watch him pace from his room to the hall to his room then back to the hall. There's a window in the hall and he stops to look through it. His head is pointed right at me, but a cast shadow over his face makes it impossible to know where his eyes are looking. I wonder if he can see me. He turns to his right and disappears for a few seconds. 1 . . . 2 . . . 3 and now I see him from the next window over. Back to his bedroom. He stands over the bed, seemingly reluctant to get in, but eventually he sits down. The light goes out. It's time to go.

5:56 am now, and a reckless taxi is speeding through, taking me to the airport. "Look at that sun! It's as red as the blood in my veins" the driver exclaims, as the sun only just pokes through the cage that the buildings locked us in. Moving onto the freeway, the whirling engines are whipping through my window, making it impossible to make out what the driver said next. I can hear him, but I haven't seen him. I never see the face that drives me home.